Arts and Dafts

Etsy Wednesday

2008-07-24T00:41:39Z

Time to start what I promised and show off some of the more unique things I find on Etsy. I think I hit the nail on the head with this one. Literally?

When I saw these earrings I had to take a peek at the rest. If you've ever liked the look of plugs but can't stand the idea of stretching your lobes or you just need to have really interesting accessories, these are certainly for you.

All of them are handcarved out of bone, wood or horn. It appears the bone and horn are a little on the heavier side and the wood is the way to go if you're looking for something lighter. Also, most of them come with pegs made of the same material which is fantastic for anyone who might have metal allergies.

The Etsy shop is called Eclectic Monkey, "Big Bold Organic Eclectic Accessories for Everyday Life." Prices range from $10-$20. Considering the obvious amount of hard work put into these, I'd say that's a steal!

photo property of shop owner carpedraco

Losing a Job, Gaining a Dream?

2008-07-22T01:32:33Z

Today I got word that my job will probably not be needing me for the first show of the season, the one I was counting on to pay the rent. My immediate response was total relief, followed by surprise since my normal reaction would be total panic.

You hear a lot about people who quit jobs to persue their life's dream. I have it pretty good. I get a long break between shows so there's no reason to quit just yet, unless you include my lack of enthusiasm, and the 18 hour days for 3 weeks straight that keep me from doing the things I love. Then I start to fall slowly into a steaming pile of guilt. Then I get grumpy and no one likes to work with a grump. Nevermind the confidence I need to muster in order to make a decsion like that.

So here lies the pickle. Do I take it as some kind of sign that I should keep plugging away here on the blog and consider the extra couple of months as a blessing? Do I panic and find other work? Should I beg the fella to find some high paying gig and take care of little ol' me?

That last one was funny.

When am I being too hopeful? When do I need to be "realistic"? Maybe I am being realistic! Maybe I am supposed to take a longer break. Maybe I'm just over thinking the entire thing. Maybe I'm just telling myself what I want to hear.

I think the most important thing I have to keep in mind is how I reacted. Why is it that instead of total shock and disappointment, I felt more like I was freed from impending doom?

All I'm certain of is the happiness with what I'm doing right now. That's the point, isn't it? To really love what you do because we are what we do, right? Or did someone extremely wealthy coin that phrase?

I love being home. I love making my own schedule. I love my coffee, my desk, my books, my drawing. I love the struggle.

I do. I love to struggle. Not financially, but with my work. I need to work hard or I feel completely useless. All my young adult life, when I was being prepped for the real world, the number one thing I was told over and over is to be ready to work from the bottom. This excites me. I enjoy working for a higher goal. The difference now is that it's mine , not someone else's. As previously discussed, this is the hard part.

So what I have learned? I want to be my boss. Now if only my boss would tell me what to do next.

Reading and Writing

2008-07-21T02:45:49Z

Rather than beat myself up for spending all of yesterday reading Blogher updates and being totally unfocused today, I chose to go to the bookstore. I often peruse the writing section, hoping to find something that isn't completely full of crap. I picked up Stephen King's On Writing and read one of the first lines:

"This is a short book because most books about writing are filled with bullshit."

Sold.

I'm halfway through and it's had me laughing out loud and even a little teary eyed. For those who are weary of Stephen King, it's not what you think.

What's so different? It's not only a helpful book about writing, but a look back into where he came from. The writing is conversational and forward. It's a peek in to Mr. King's personality which I find surprisingly friendly and relatable.

If you're at all interested in the art of writing, Stephen King or just a good read, you have to get this. I am an insanely picky reader and don't recommend lightly. Nothing gets me more excited than a book I enjoy so much that I can read it in one sitting. For my multitasking mind, this is zen.

I also picked up a couple Richard Matheson books. I'm a gigantic fan of his. If you've only seen the movie I Am Legend and haven't read the book yet, I highly suggest you do so. It's brilliant.

How about you? Any great recommendations? I'd love to hear them. Always looking for something new!

Sometimes

2008-07-19T03:28:45Z

Originally uploaded by RGP

Sometimes I see a photograph and everything just falls into place. Thousands of other times this is not the case.

Sometimes there is so much going on in my head that I have to just sit back and listen to my thoughts. A lot of the time it's just the Girl from Ipanema.

Sometimes when I don't feel like writing, I just start to type. Then, all of the sudden, it's the only thing I want to do and I can't stop and then I have to go back and edit all the run on sentences, and commas.

Sometimes I use the eraser too much when I'm drawing and I have to pull back and refocus. Every now and then something great happens but usually I just end up covered in eraser bits.

Sometimes I go to the kitchen and I step in cat vomit.

All I Gotta Do Is Act Naturally

2008-07-18T01:01:43Z

I have something to confess. This is what I want to do.

It's hard to admit that. Especially in a world where just about anyone can write a blog and be noticed. So what makes me so special?

I'm not a mommy blogger, nor do I ever intend to be. I'm not a total tech geek, though sometimes I wish I was, and I'm not selling anything fancy, not yet at least.

In fact, this has sort of been my problem all along. I'm not one of those lucky people who was born with a particular passion in life. I mean sure, I want to write, but what about? I'm more of a passionate dabbler. I find that I actually learn the most from other people's obsessions.

When I meet someone so into with what they do, I can't help but latch on to the energy. Their love makes me want to know more. And it's all about meeting them. I can't just read it in a book, see it online or hanging on a wall. I need to feel the emotion up close, hear the excitement in their voice.

For example, recently I was invited to an art opening over in the village. It was a small gallery and as I suspected, mostly filled with art that made me think "Really? Can't my cat do that?" In fact, I was with Gypsy at the time and I do believe his direct quote was, "Is that a cat toy?"

So we're joking around under our breath when suddenly we were introduced to one of the artists. This was his first exhibit in New York and he was so excited. I mean beaming! His attitude completely turned me around and on to his work. I even told him that if I had the (ridiculous) $5,000, I would buy his installment.

You know what? I totally meant it. I would have bought it not because I thought it was this remarkable piece of work, but because of the impression he left on me. His attitude stands out in a world where most ooze a sense of entitlement. In my mind, this is the mark of true passion.

So where does this leave me? Well after some deep thought it has become clear that I am passionate about finding my passion. I may not know exactly what it is yet but I do know that I want to find it. So this is my goal.

I guess that's been the idea behind this whole life changing experience in the first place. It just took me this long to really start piecing it together.

Here's to one more step forward.

So, what's your passion?

I took the photo above at Prospect Park in Brooklyn. In this post it represents a moment of reflection because I am profound like that.

Living Vicariously at Blogher

2008-07-17T01:59:41Z

Originally uploaded by RGP

I am feeling some major Blogher envy tonight as I read all the twits and blogs of the attendees. I hope I can attend next year. For now I'm getting myself ready to watch the podcasts and maybe even take a rare trip into Second Life for some of those events.

My latest in the 365 Daily Doodle Project/100 Things (Silence and Questioning):

Doodle a Day

2008-07-16T02:31:57Z

Sharing my last two drawings from the Doodle a Day for a Year project. These are also numbers 13 and 14 of the 100 Things Project within a Project.

I don't need any more projects thanks.

#13 - Misfortune

#14 - Smile

Back to the Future

2008-07-14T18:01:05Z

Some are old. Some are new. Some are barely touched. Some are full to the last page. Some are missing. Some are gone forever. All of them are me.

Sometimes I have to look back in order to see what's ahead more clearly. Today I looked back in the best way I know how. My journals.

I went in with the intention of finding some inspiration today. I guess you could say I got it in spades. I found my entry for September 10, 2001. I didn't even know I had written anything that day.

It's nothing substantial really, except for the date. I was sitting at an outdoor cafe before work, drinking coffee and watching early morning Manhattan pass me by. I had just moved there days before and was on my first big NYC theater job.

When I read it, I wanted to reach out and tell that person they'll never be the same. I wanted to tell her when she gets to work the next day, she'll be growing up fast. She'll gain a new outlook on life. Everything will seem much shorter and most importantly, completely different.

Then I really start to think about it. Every journal feels like the beginning and end of a different side of me. The only constant is that I still write about it. I always write about it. I wouldn't really call it an escape like some do, it's more like a bunch of little 'come to jesus' meetings with my future self. Reminding me who I was, what I do, who I wanted to be and who I've become.

Today I am reminded that I am whoever I want to be, so long as I keep learning, keep writing and keep exploring.

"Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today." - James Dean

So, how about you? Ever take a look back at yourself and find something surprising?

Finding Inspiration

2008-07-14T03:59:49Z

Originally uploaded by RGP

Inspiration, to me, is motivation. Some mornings I wake up inspired, ready to take on the day. However, those days are rare and most of the time I find myself having to seek it out.

Inspiration is my personal fuel. I grab my creative moments from other people's creative moments. Its what makes my little world go 'round. So when I find something that works, I take note of it and use it whenever possible.

One of my main sources? Music. I am not a musician myself, though I do dabble in song while cleaning the kitchen or taking a shower (naturally) and all my life I have been surrounded by good music and musicians. For crying out loud, I was named after one.

Words have always been a musical prompt for me. If I chew on a word long enough (or sometimes instantly) a song I know starts to play in my head. I now consider this to be a technique. I find said song and play it over and over until whatever it is my brain has planned, comes out.

As I mentioned previously, I was struggling with my drawing project. Inspiration was nowhere to be found and I was drawing the same thing over and over again. Then I found the 100 Things list and thought "Great! Some inspiration!" and for the first few days, that was all I needed.

Then I started to over think it. It was when I got to "innocence".

"Innocence? Nothing is innocent!" cried my overactive brain. I realized I was just searching too hard. Begging my brain for something unique and coming up blank.

Quite literally as I thought at one point I would just scan a blank page. How profound am I?

So now I really listen to the word. I guess you could say I wait for it to sing to me. This has completely changed my way of thinking for this project. It wasn't until now that I realized all my favorite drawings were completley inspired by whatever I was listening to at the time. Music genuinely effects my every emotion and in turn, my imagination opens up to a new level.

So how about you? I would love to hear what really drives you to write that next blog, draw that next piece or even get up and cook dinner. Anything can be inspired, right down to what you're wearing today. So what did it for you? Have you created any inspiring techniques? I'd love to know! Maybe your inspiration can become someone else's.

The picture above is #12 of the 100 Things project. The word is "Insanity" and System of a Down was the music that inspired it. It may seem like I only listen to heavy music but I assure you that is not the case. My taste is extremely eclectic and no genre is missing from my ipod. Seriously, I even have some yodeling.

Moving On Up

2008-07-13T02:14:44Z

I have finally taken the next big step as a blogger. They told me this day would come.

The fella gave me grief about something over the phone. I threatened to blog about it. It's like a new super power.

For now I give you this picture. Enjoy!

You Make Me Feel

2008-07-12T00:45:34Z

Originally uploaded by RGP

I've been rather hard on myself lately, trying not to think things like "I suck" but as you know, being a human being, this is no small feat. So I am reminding myself of the little moments that made me feel...kinda good about myself.

Back in college I was forced to take acting classes in order to finish out my major, Arts Management. A secret part of me loved this but the rest of me absolutely hated the idea. In one particular class, we were told to get into groups, sit in a circle and tell the others what we thought about them. Lucky me, I got stuck in a group with a girl I absolutely hated. I mean hated. Top to bottom. Left to right. Big boobs and all, I couldn't stand her. We had this ridiculous fight about a guy when she first arrived at the school as a freshman. I didn't know her at all except that she was trying to steal my man of the week.

So here I am, sitting on the floor of the theater staring at a group of my peers... and this girl, and we're told to tell everyone in the pow-wow what we thought of them when we met.

Of course my brain said: "Hmm, let me think, when I first saw you I wanted to rip out your little blond hairs one by one, kick you in the boobs and throw a football at your button nose just like in the Brady Bunch. Was that Jan or Marsha? Doesn't matter 'cause you look like Cindy."

But I didn't get to go first, she did.

And what did she say about me?

"You intimidate me."

I would have fallen over from the impact if I wasn't already sitting on the floor.

At first I was pissed. How dare you call out my badassedness in front of all these...peers. Then I chewed on it for a second and realized, I loved it. It was the best thing anyone could have ever said. Beneath this hard exterior of mine, I'm just as much of a wuss as everyone else and of course would love a little validation. Well, I got it. I mean, she went ahead and juiced up my ego with about a gallon of Red Bull.

I quietly rejoiced, checked my face to make sure I wasn't showing it on the outside and then made up a little dance that I would do later in the privacy of my dorm room.

Then, naturally, reality came rushing back. Now I have to say something nice about her.

Sorry to disappoint, but honestly, I don't remember what I said that day. I do know this, we eventually became friends. I know, big surprise, I made up with the girl who (I was convinced) pretty much worshiped the ground I walked on cause, y'know, I'd intimidated her into submission.

Oh, and she eventually came out of the closet which was a double victory because that guy I was seeing earlier in this story? I got rid of him and now she would have nothing to do with him either. Oh the hilarity.

How about you? Ever become friends with someone you hated at first? Or more specifically, because they made you feel like a badass?

Blah

2008-07-10T20:19:36Z

Originally uploaded by RGP

I have the blahs.

Drawing. Blah.

Writing. Blah.

Photography. Blah.

Staring. Blah.

Shower. Blah.

Eating. Blah.

Reading. Blah.

Television. OhEmGee, Burn Notice started it's new season! I love you Bruce Campbell! Oh and BIG BROTHER STARTS SUNDAY!! Did you see the new house is up all over the interwebs for viewing? Did you know there's a 76 year old man in the house this season? I did, I did! Oh and they're replaying all of Dexter until the new season starts. And and and....

Priorities. Blah.

Everywhere The Signs

2008-07-10T02:43:49Z

I believe in signs. Well, I believe that when you notice a theme popping up in your every day life, it's usually a pretty good idea to pay attention to it and assess the situation. (Do you hear Dane Cook in your head when you read "assess the situation? If so, we are insta-friends.)

I've had a few lately but the most obvious of all is distraction. Holy crap am I distracted. Today I even sat and stared at nothing. Nothing distracts me!

Seriously. It started when I was watching a film the other day about a writer who locks himself in his apartment without his television or stereo, etc. It works and he gets his script written. Oh, he also dies but that's beside the point.

The point is, it got me thinking. As I turned on another movie I thought "Hey, maybe I am distracting myself too much." I don't even know what the next movie I watched was because I was too distracted about being distracted. I wish I was kidding.

So I left my little office, cleaned off the kitchen table and sat myself out there for awhile with my sketchbook. The walls are nice in there. I hung some flowers there awhile ago and they're all dried out and crispy. Maybe I should take those down. You know what? I don't think we need all these placemats on the table. Maybe I should stack them up in a neat pile. That's better. Man this table really needs to be wiped down...

SHIT!

I was going to tell you about that photograph up there but I got...y'know. It's a geode my cousin gave me for my birthday. I just found out today that it's actually meant, spirtually speaking, to cleanse the mind, relax and bring on the creativity. Also happens to be a Gemini crystal. Seriously folks, signs. They're everywhere.

What about you? Had any signs lately? Or perhaps some serious distractions?

My Project Within a Project

2008-07-08T20:24:58Z

I didn't want to post any of this until I was good and ready. I've decided to start another project within my 365 project but I genuinely needed to make sure I could commit to it. Knowing how I am, a double commitment is like a stroll over Mt. Everest.

I've been feeling pretty unmotivated with my drawings for quite some time now and I know I need some kind of push so I did a little googling and found this great 100 Things list. At first I thought "100 Things? Shit, I'll never finish it." As usual not giving myself enough credit.

Then it occured to me that I'm going to be drawing something every day anyway, might as well try.

The real struggle? I am the worst decision maker. Sure, the list is right there, all written out for me, but I have to DECIDE what I want to draw in each category. I have to DEFINE each and every word. What have I gotten myself into?

So I wrote it all out, as you can see here, because when I write things out by hand, they start to make more sense to me. I can soak it in. Chew on it if you will. I began to realize that this isn't your typical list of "things". Everything on it has potential to tell a great story.

I'm excited.

I'm following through.

I have completed 7 days so far.

And yes, the list is my "introduction" because writing it all out was a major feat and creative burst for me. So neener.

You can check out the rest on my 100 Thing flickr set and as usual you can see the entire 365 project as well. .

Saturdays are Drunk Dial Days

2008-07-06T16:43:30Z

For those of you who may be unaware, my other half has been gone since May 1st. He has a job down south that keeps him away for the 4 months of summer. Sometimes I go with him, other times I say "No freakin' way am I going back there ever again!" Then I make him feel guilty for "leaving me behind".

I know, that's really girly of me but I never pretended to be a full time tomboy.

So as with all long distance relationships, which I don't really consider us to be, we're more of a "What? I get 4 months to myself and no nagging?" kind of couple (we see the positive in everything), all communications are via cell phone.

Have I ever mentioned here just how much I hate phone "conversations"? We all know there's rarely any conversing going on, it's usually one person who won't shut up and another person trying to make excuses. I come from the school of short-and-sweet. Who is this? Why did you call? My response. End conversation. Unless you're my mom, oh the poor woman, she has the patience of Buddha when I call her.

The boy is actually pretty good about understanding my loathing of the phone. He usually keeps it short unless I've decided to go off on some tirade about nothing important or to tease him with all the great shows I've been watching and he can't because he doesn't have cable down there and "Gee, I'll try to keep it on the Tivo until you return." *delete*

But Saturdays, they're my penance for being the impatient girlfriend that I am. Saturdays are his day off. Saturdays, he gets his drink on. We'll usually start the day with a quick call telling each other what we're up to and how we plan to spend the day. Then maybe another call or text just to say hello, but by the end of the day? It's all over and I am given the ultimate test of my patience. How many slurred stories with minute long pauses can I endure before my patience runs out?

When I really think about it, If I was dating me, every day might be Drunk Dial Day and to be honest, half of the time I'm convinced he's just messing with me. He knows he gets real "southern" when he drinks. Me being a born and bred New Englander, well, you know how we can be. Have you ever heard a conversation between a true blue yankee (just to be clear, Let's Go Mets) and a stereotypical southerner? It's kinda like someone keeps playing with the fast forward and slow-mo buttons during a wrestling match.

So a typical Saturday conversation where I genuinely give it my all to listen:

Me: "Hey hon, did you have a good day?"

Him: ".........................Yeah!"

Me: "Awesome, what did you do?"

Him: "........I floated around...............around in the water."

Me: "Cool!"

Him:"............................................."

Me: "Hello?"

Him: "Yeah, yeah.....I'm here................................................"

Me: "Anything else?"

Him: "Nope, that's about it........................................"

Me: "Oh, okay, well I..."

Him: "Except for the crab incident........................"

Me: "............................"

Him: "........................"

Me: " Crab incide...."

Him: "Yeah, crabs..."

And so on. No seriously.

With all that having been said, the most important thing you need to know is how much I do love the boy. He's about the only one willing to put up with me and the only person I've ever been willing to test my patience with....for now.